This is the end Part 2

a close up bunch of first hand experiences with death by me

So now, to the big D the one everyone pretends never happens until it happens......

I feel in Western society we have some really screwed up perceptions/beliefs around physical death ....so much judgement and concepts like hell and some people just think you become worm food, and I’m not here to tell you what to believe just share some things I experienced along the way and certainly in my now moment have made the recent losing of my 3 year old dog easier, still sad but much easier .So even tho I am not wanting to do the whole “when I was young thing “ I need to go back to one of my first encounters in knowing of death.

Funnily enough both of them are to do with budgies (cute little native Australian birds ) The first funeral I wanted to go to was my Auntie “Budgie” I only knew her as a frail elderly woman in a nursing home bed who I visited for a least a few years, her voice was strained and her big thick glasses made her eyes extra large, I loved her, going to visit was never a chore and we, at least my Father and I to my memory would go and stay for an hour or more fairly regularly. I was around 5 when she passed and my parents would not let me go to the funeral. It was the first time in my life that I protested about what I was told, my Mother insisted I was too young. I knew what death was as we already had said goodbye to a dog and it was on the news every night for fucks sake . Anyway it was a no - you’re too young , hhhmmm how is that even possible? Since that time I have been to funerals that have children even babies there, in fact my son went to more funerals by the time he was two than birthday parties ,however that was the era (1970’s) and that’s how white bread and steak people did it I guess.I don’t know if she thought I was going to be scared or whether she thought I was going to run amok, not likely I wasn’t that kind of kid plus I was sad that she was gone.I wonder if I am the only child who has been so insistent they want to go to a funeral?

Perhaps I am a true gothic girl at heart, so much so that only a year or so later we had buried one of our budgies in the thin strip of garden that ran down the drive way , many months later my little goth self just had to go and see what it looked like. It wasn’t buried deep , so I got my mothers garden trowel and pushed back the soil. It was actually still intact a perfect skeleton of the delightful little bird, I felt like an archeologist, I did not dare tell anyone for fear of the judgement it may bring.

Over the years other elders in my family passed, but it wasn’t till I was 15 that my great aunt did something quite miraculous. I was at home by myself at night and the phone rang and my auntie Annie was on the other end, she told me how she’d had a” bit of a fall” - old people are so funny - just a bit of a fall and she was going to the hospital and to let my parents know. Well it was a broken hip ,slightly more than “a bit” she had tripped on the rug at home,(I still have very few rugs in my house to this day, ) and it took her down, she then dragged herself to the phone and called the hospital and then our house-so gutsy! Probably where I get it from. Now this is the same woman who that day caught the bus, went shopping for one of my sisters wedding present wrapped it and cooked dinner earlier so you could say that at 92 or was it 94? (anyway old) she was still in pretty great health. Anyways, the next day after school I went in to see her, they had her dosed up on strong painkillers, at that age they were something I knew nothing about. She said “go tell the nurse to get your sisters wedding present in the hall on the night stand “, ok, straight up , right there, I knew that wasn’t possible , cos the night stand with the present on it was at her home over 25 kilometres away and the nurse was in the hospital, slight brain scramble in my head and then I realised she was in two places at the same time. Then she said “the doctor has told me I might have to stay in bed for 6 months, if that’s the case I’m not staying” .OK W.T.F ? I sat with that and wasn’t quite sure but kind of thought I was sure what she was saying. Well the next day it was clear, when I got home from school my Mum told me she had died of “pneumonia” under

anaesthetic. NAH , nope , I call bullshit I knew that wasn’t true. It struck me BOOM! That was what she meant about “not staying”, she walked out , left her body ,of course the anaesthetic helped but years later I would discover that this “pneumonia” thing was what doctors say coz they don’t know what the fuck happened and it sounds so plausible , who’s going to argue with them anyway. Now in this day and age with everyone watching all those CSI Miami and crap they know too much and wouldn’t buy that reasoning me thinks nor would they buy the idea that she just magically left her body. For the past 20 years I have read so much information about death- transitioning from this planet and in one metaphysical talk it was talked about “if you are not happy just walk out” !! Really you mean in my teens I could have left this place!Well obviously I didn’t want to , because if i did I could have done and “Auntie Annie “and just skipped off.

I realised she was some one in my family who knew stuff I wanted to know! I sensed it and now fuck it ,she’s gone and there is no one left to ask, my oldest sister asked me during the funeral why I was so upset, I was weeping btw, how could I explain it, that link ripped away from me? I knew she wouldn’t get it and it was also the only time I wanted to punch her sorry big sister it really hurt my feelings that you didn’t understand my loss and that I really loved her so much.

Anyways one thing I learnt in my 40’s was when a person or a pet crosses over you have around 5 days to connect with their soul/spirit, they kind of “float” around and visit people and places on the earth and it is a really great opportunity to communicate with them. Now some of you may already be thinking , thanks Jenni not really a revelation, but I didn’t know it and I feel it’s definitely worth passing this information on.

When my Mum died suddenly, it was a good opportunity to try this “5 day” theory out, connect in and confess to a whole bunch of stuff she didn’t know I did in my life .I took a big spliff outside smoked it and told her things, including the shitty

relationship with her grandsons Father I was too ashamed to tell her about and that yes I had taken drugs with the hope of learning stuff she was about to go do. I felt no judgement or disappointment from her, she had been in chronic pain for so many years, she let me know she now was free. It is difficult to explain , its almost like images mixed with words that are not words come into your brain, a form of telepathy if you will, and I did felt her presence very strongly 12 years later.... I have some days where I feel her so strongly and that statement some days makes me want to cry because I wish she was able to be here.I have had two different mediums bring her energy through and every time there is no way they could make up the things that have been conveyed in the sessions. My Mum and Arch Angel Uriel stopped me buying a house that was the worst choice I could have made for us by literally stopping the electronic funds going through ! Absolutely true. I did the electronic transaction 4 times and each time it would not work, now I can be a little 21st century technically challenged but this process was super easy.At the end of the day after bank closing time my medium friend sent me a txt to say congratulations and I told her that the funds didn’t go thru, she asked if I wanted a reading from her and I said yes please. My mother told me there was something better to come. I knew inside that whilst the house was cute it was not even close to what I wanted but I was so over of looking for two years throwing big money at rent and storage fees that I had pretty much given up and was prepared to take the crumbs on the plate. 5 days later the same friend calls me and said she saw a house online that was everything I was looking for. By the end of the next week I had put a deposit on where I currently live and the funds went through first pop! You may say thats a coincidence and that’s ok for me it wasnt and its my story right! lol

Let’s move to the present day as I write these stories and I’ll give you a few examples of what in my 20’s I would have called “cool shit” and now understand it has more to do with the

magic, abilities what ever you want to call it that no one had told me about.

A dear friend of mine lives in Vancouver and she married an Australian man, we only met at his death, yep you read it right. I was about to go to sleep one night when this man who I didn’t recognise appeared, he smiled and was looking at me, but only with the right side of his face, his energy was kind and after a minute or so he disappeared. HHmmm strange I thought until two days later my friend rings from Canada to tell me he had died in a motorbike accident and that one whole side of his face was messed up really badly. I go look at the wedding invite photo she sent me and bam, Ok now I know who it was! A few months later she came to Australia to see his parents and to hang out together. On the second night I was woken by some one walking down our hallway, she called out to me and I answered Yep and that was that, until the next morning she woke up and she was so happy and cheery , humming and almost a skip in her step. She told me how her deceased husband and come and cuddled up to her in bed, she could really truely feel him and hear the noises he makes in his sleep. I realised that it was his presence that I could be feel in the house as an actual alive human being and tho she didn’t remember calling out to me it had woken her subconscious also.

Years later after some deeper delving into my abilities through different modalities comes this next experience...

A person that I had only ever written a couple of letters to ( he was a cousin of my son’s father, not twice removed tho lol ) , I was informed via txt message he had crossed over.I was driving back from town and I thought about him and BOOM a whole “conversation” / experience happened all in mere seconds. It made me realise how amazing people who channel are, how they have honed this ability, images and a conversation per se all happened so quickly it was incredible,I felt like I was now holding my wand in my hand!! I ‘m going to

share a bit more of the details about the relationship with this person so it gives more context , as they say its all about the details .This man I am referring to for many in Australian indigenous family history is well know, Born Russell Moore he was adopted and then renamed by a white family as James Savage, he had been in jail nearly all his life in America an intensely sad story of the Stolen generations history of this country, you can find a lot of information on the world web about him if you want to. We had written a few letters back and forth to each other. I sent a few photos of the bone sculptures I used to make and skulls I painted, which when he replied , in his words “ I think you are a really weird girl but nice as well” which made me laugh when I read it.When I thought about him after that text the connection with him was instantaneous and he had a bit of a laugh about “the bone girl” it all came flooding in. He also made me aware that he was now content and free, real freedom of body and spirit, I could actually feel his happiness and see his heart smile it was beautiful.

One of my dearest friends had 5 children, one decided he was going to leave the planet early at 15 years old and took his life. Absolutely heartbreaking, and nothing will ever prepare you for that. The night after he left I tuned into his spirit, at first I was angry with him, disappointed and also felt guilty for what I or anyone could have done for him to get him to stay, instantly he conveyed to me that he wanted to go and it wasn’t to do with anyone, I would later learn about soul contracts that we make before we come here to earth , “suicide” which has such a heavy vibration of shame and guilt and loss is not often understood. When some one does it out of despair or shame it is different to just knowing its time the contract was finished.I am not suggesting that it makes it any easier for those left on earth. This happened 6 years ago and twice he has “popped” by. One time he showed me spirals of bright electric blue above all of his siblings and Mother’s head ,I have read information that star families have patterns or symbols that they use as a signature to recognise each other and he was showing me that

they are from the same star family ,which is not as common as one would think(we will dive into that pool on another story time adventure),I felt him just arrive on the deck as I was looking out into the trees. The other time he just hung out for a minute or two and let me know he’s off having an amazing experience elsewhere and was really happy.

Now just while I think of it , if you have experienced a deep loss one of the best books I have read on this subject is called “The afterlife of Billy Fingers “ and I highly recommend it,It gives amazing insight into the experiences after we leave the body. It’s a woman whose brother has passed away and then he connects and communicates with her.

Pets do have a spirit a soul if you will just as we do ,as do all animals actually and a few weeks ago I put my 3 year old dog down, he was a beautiful and yet savage and slightly psycho little Pomeranian who was attacking everyone - he had to go. After losing your parents or dear close friends, losing an animal didn’t seem as painful, that is not to say it didn’t hurt because it did, but it was a different approach for me as this time I had much clearer insights into the other realms and to death.

So the day after he was gone I woke in the morning and decided to do a mediation in bed.I pictured myself under a beautiful blossoming apple tree with my unicorn( a book about the magic of trees wrote that is where unicorns live so why not go there right?) so we sat beside each other.Next thing a giant almost lion size version of our dog strolled casually in and sat next to me. He was so majestic and he could talk, his mouth did not open this was all done through telepathy, it was a definite and real connection and I had not experienced anything like this with any of my other dogs. We conversed about how he was a more complete version of himself and he was most pleased and content within himself as this lion sized Pomeranian, he rolled over like he used to to let me rub his now giant belly ,he was content, at peace in his heart which he was not when he was alive ,and I could actually feel his fur,

then we walked off together down a tunnel of wisteria I have created in a garden in meditation. A week later I felt his new extra large majestic ness come and sit beside me, and I am looking forward to more interactions as time goes by. An update since I began writing this , he has now come into my meditation garden on several occasions, some times large and grand and some times tiny.

One thing I have experienced is that there is more than living here on earth and there is are amazing benevolent places to go explore after you finish here.There are many cultures and even pop culture (Thor and marvel movies) that refer to the rainbow bridge that you cross over as you leave earth .My dog it seems may be able to cross back and forth over that bridge to accompany me along this journey of magic, a guardian, trusted companion, a familiar. He got skills that little Pomeranian!

I want to dive into to the two different types of physical death lets keep it really basic and I’ll use two personal examples.

There’s the sudden , no one saw that coming death, it’s really painful. My Mum underwent surgery and she seemed to be bouncing back 4 days after it. I went and visited her and she was bright and and as happy as one could be in hospital. She had had a series of falls earlier in the year and after her first one I told her she looked like she didn’t want to be here anymore, which was the energy she had the day I saw her. So she picked herself back up but deep down I know that her circumstances of being put into high care would have wrecked her(she lasted 6 weeks, same as her Mother almost ) Anyway six hours later the hospital rang to say she was gone. It took me years for that deep sorrow to shift. I had no idea it was coming. The writing was on the wall? Probably I just refused to look at that wall.It’s 12 years later and I can write this without having tears run down my face- but I gotta tell ya if you are

close to your Mum that’s one of the biggest wounds.

Now my dad was different. He spent 5 years after Mum crossed over on the planet. He went on a few cruises but I also knew - I have this what can be an unfortunate at times ability off feeling peoples energy, I knew he was in beige tile mode. He pretended to be happy however the move into a “retirement village” as I told him was the slippery slope to the end. Well it wasn’t a slippery slope it was more like that slide you go on and you don’t really move , you have to force your way down and it’s a massive effort and pretty lame.

He had a fall and ended up in hospital and I rang him one night and I knew he was so so soooooo depressed. So I drove a couple of hours to go see him. He was concerned about my siblings and the lives they would have, including me. I said to him that wasn’t his problem- we were all over 40 by this stage and no one was smoking crack homeless under a bridge. We had a deep talk about alot of things and I knew he would last maybe a year at the most. Well yep another somewhat unfortunate “ability” I was right. He had a massive stroke and was blessed by a 48 vigil of all his children and grandchildren and friends coming to say goodbye, I say blessed coz Mum died alone- well trying to be resuscitated that would suck and I learnt later she was terrified. He could hear, but his eyes were closed and he couldn’t talk. So he had people with him right until his last breath. I was able to hold a light and space at his funeral for him as I knew he was done and at 88 he had had some great times in his life and got to go out with relative ease and grace. So whilst I grieved I had a good year to prepare, unlike my siblings who were somewhat oblivious to his “doneness”. He had a huge collection of diaries and his final year every day would document how much time he spent “alone”, every page a testament to his sorrow. Most Australian families tend to push there parents aside as they age, I had told my parents that I wanted them to have their own home but live on the same property as me when they got older, it never happened tho. I love that many European and Asian families no

matter how hard it may get bring their parents back into their lives to honour the time they gave and to give them a life they deserve.

The leaving of your body to go somewhere else is inevitable. So let’s look for the magic in it, because there is magic in everything.

Honour the person through the grief that you feel , don’t try and hide it. Have a fucking good cry, society often puts this pressure on us to “man up” ,“get over it” “suck it up Princes” these terms do not sit well with me, especially in times of grief. I am not suggesting locking yourself away crying and crying and spiral down into a pit of despair, if we can deal with our emotions the latest buzz phrase is”process it” then we can also still function in our day to day life. If it is some one deeply close I can tell you it will come and go like waves on the beach , sometimes crashing hard and other times lapping gently, it will flow when it does and that is ok. Going into nature can really help, numbing yourself out with alcohol or drugs will not help, I repeat WILL . NOT . HELP.

Local indigenous culture in Australia has the term “sorry business”, giving people time after to grieve and that sorry business applies to all the different deaths I discussed here and in part 1. I will say it here, if you end a relationship with a lover I advise (tho as always its up to you boo) to give yourself some time to exhale, feel your emotions and grieve it , avoid jumping into another relationship or even into a casual bed hop - it will probably end in tears, even if it takes years there’ll still be

tears /pain whatever way you experience grief and endings. As humans all endings have a form of grief and even that job that you thought you wanted to leave, or were forced to leave needs a moment to breathe and re adjust your big panties and walk on, coz who wants to walk around with their pants either stuck up their crack or falling down around their ankles right!

In celebration of yourself and those around you ,don’t worry about what would so and so think or “what would Jesus do “ he

doesn’t care anyways just quietly (for those who read the bible remember it says “judge not “well he doesn’t ), just be your best version of you, be honest with people that you need time if that’s what you need, it is inevitable that you and everyone you love will leave this body , tho they never really die and if you look at one of my favourite cultures from Mexico Dias De Los Muertos or as westerns call it Day Of The Dead , it is a beautiful connection with those who have passed, an honouring and remembering of loved ones that they will always

exist ,always.

Also as my and your wand abilities kick in you can try connecting with your loved ones, there really is more than just this planet/plane of existence and that’s some real true honest magic.

The final death is being experienced by the entire planet right now and that is the death of our way of life, this does not have to be a terrible experience. If you speak to indigenous in Australia the “Dreamtime” is ever evolving not something that happened in the past . Earth hurtles through space constantly and therefore we are always on the move and we know there has been many many different climatic changes and civilisations over the millions of years. Over the time of the pandemic work , school , lifestyles all changed and like what I wrote about in part 1 that has lead to many people going through their identity death. The world is in a mass consciousness grieving time and like I have seen when a dear friend of our group of pink friends died suddenly everyone reacts to that differently.One of my friends one night lost his shit - sober the next day everything seemed back to “normal” however the grief was deep and the reaction intense. So my piece of magical wisdom I would like to impart is , try and be patient/compassionate with everyone you come across , you have no idea how many people they have had to lose, their job, their peace of mind. We have a a great opportunity to walk

consciously beside one another and work our magic together .